I Call This Maturing Like A Flower GotDammit

You know, life is beautiful. And I mean that in the most literal way too. I am an 18 year old girl who has been through a fair share of shit. But see we all do. As girls we tend to see a lot of things one sided. What I mean by that is we sometimes tend to think the world revolves around us and our problems.  Okay okay I know i'm kind of all over the place right now but just follow me dammit.  You know when your growing up and theres this boy you have the biggest crush on and you just like them soooo bad you think your in love but at the same time your like 14 and stupid. This particular friend was that guy. We grew up and grew apart and went our separate ways. But recently we reconnected and have just been talking (& I mean that in the most "JUST TALKING" way possible. And I'll admit my little Junior High School feelings started resurfacing. But He's been in a relationship with someone who from my understanding is a great girl. And Today their 1st child was born.

Now when I found out, The first 2 seconds I just felt like I got punched in the stomach. (in no way shape or form and i saying i want a baby right now) Then I processed it and smiled out of respect for their new gift and proceeded to text my friend and congratulate him and his Girlfriend for their new gift from God. Now before you start calling me a low-key spiteful ass hoe. Let me explain to you why the first 2 seconds felt like I got punched. Because honestly those innocent 8th grade feelings still linger & Because apart of me thinks the world revolves around me.

Good thing is I didn't let those feelings takeover and fall into a mode of asking myself why I don't have a relationship as beautiful or why I am I single, and all that other "why why why"bullshit. Reality is, you don't get anywhere in life by hating on others. And like I said life doesn't just revolve around you. Be patient and your time will come. (Lol now i'm talking to myself)  When I put that into perspective I really from the bottom of my heart was happy for my friend and his lady in their new journey together. & I Pray that their new family prospers in every aspect.

As for me, I just need to keep chasing these dreams I got. Knocking out Normandale and moving to the Big NYC. Mr.Right will come its only just a matter of time.

As for you, If your a girl and reading this. I just want to say You aren't a bad person and your not alone if sometimes you get jealous or hate on someone for a second. (Hence I said a second.) Its only wrong if your drown yourself in it and start preying on peoples downfalls. thats when you are a hater and thats when I can't defend your actions. Just remember the world doesnt revolve around you &  "DONT HATE APPRECIATE

PS. Again congratulations to you both and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I promise I'm not  a low-key spiteful plotting ass hoe lol.